Jazz Club
I.
bold and brassy
the trumpeter’s tune
is blown into the night
mixing with
shimmering cymbals
wood clashing
onto metal
flirting with saucy saxophones
sensually
flowing
l o n g and piercing
through the air
and accompanying bass
repeatedly pumping
out the rhythm
complimenting cool
quick
beats of the drum
hit the backbeat
and go
Go
GO
II
I sit back
in the crooked
wooden chair
watching my brother bop
his head
lost
in the music
I am buzzed
too many beers
blue smoke
t
w
i
s
t
s
around my fingers
as I pump my
cigarette
in
time
to
the
bass
ah, sorry for the loss as well...that second part, i was right there...have been there...and so it brought back memories...listening to tunes, a bit too buzzed...ha...love your description of the music in the first...
ReplyDelete:-) Thank you!! I love jazz clubs almost as much as I love mosh pits!!
DeleteI love how this snakes and smokes on the page, a great reflection of the subject matter. I'm glad you found a less concerning subject :). Very nice to meet you and thank you for joining us today at dVerse!
ReplyDeleteThank you!! I'm a way better writer now that I'm not 'messed up' all of the time!! Thanks for the prompt!! :-)
Deletevery cool.
ReplyDeletei love the style you used here - i am not into Jazz usually, but the way you bring it to paper, i could be persuaded otherwise.
great work.
I like any kind of music that sounds cool to me!! :-) Check out some Charlie Parker the next time you think about jazz!!
DeleteLove it! The form went superbly with the musical rhythm and alliterations to accompany the instruments. And being an ex-smoker, I was tapping my cigarette to the beat with you. Your former professor would be proud indeed! Nicely done
ReplyDeleteThank you!! Ex-smoker too now!! This is a scene from a few years back!! :-)
DeleteYeah, this sums up the jazz club experience for me, enjoyed the form, Well Done !!
ReplyDeleteThanks!! I love jazz clubs, so much fun!! :-)
Deleteloved the crooked chair and how the post seems to dance
ReplyDeleteThank you!! :-)
DeleteWonderful capture of a moment
ReplyDelete:-) Thank you!!
DeleteAll I can say is I really like it... thoroughly enjoyed.
ReplyDeleteWell, thank you!! I appreciate it!! :-)
DeleteA very creative format of writing ~ I can see the words pumping and twisting along with your words ~ Good one ~
ReplyDeleteThank you!! I was pretty fun to write!! :-)
Deletei love jazz and play the saxophone myself...so you don't have to ask if i enjoyed the poem...smiles
ReplyDeleteYay!! I'm glad you enjoyed it!! I Love the saxophone, such an awesome sounding instrument!! :-)
DeleteI think he would approve ~ marvellous shape to your poem.
ReplyDeleteThank you!! I appreciate it!! :-)
Delete